This is the first year that we have had company during the Oscars! I have several girls over here and we are eating junk food and pretending that we don’t have to stay up until dawn to show our love for all things Oscar. (Side note: thanks to Jeanne and Mike for fighting with the slingbox for a few hours to make it work for the party tonight!)
Here we go:
22:54. The pre-red carpet is such a struggle. Guliana is wearing an aquarium for a dress and Kellie is talking about Spanx. Again. Ready for the real red carpet!
23:01. Heeere’s Ryan! He looks the same as he always does! Jennifer Lawrence is the first up and in a stunning red dress. I feel bad that she got shoved down the carpet first- she is nominated and they should send all those random presenters down first. She has obviously decided to embrace her inevitable loss and just show people that even though she won’t win, she is smokin’ hot.
23:07 Ryan is interviewing someone that makes him look tall. This is probably the highlight of Ryan’s life.
23:12 Melissa Leo forgot the rule: if you can see your own reflection in your dress, do not wear that dress.
23:16 Armie Hammer wins the award for real name that should be a porn name but isn’t.
23:23 Haylie Haylie Haylie, why did no one tell you that color dress washes you out? You have been KILLING on the red carpet and after that amazing Prada for the Globes you were poised to be on of the best dressed tonight and I don’t think it is going to happen.
23:26 Mila nailed it. I am jealous of all who can pull off lavender and she looks exceptional. I have nothing snarky to say.
23:28 Mandy Moore looks georgeous. Her earrings are a little vintage flea market but overall it is just the right amount of sparkle. So far the presenters are beating the pants off the nominees in the dress department.
23:33 I really like Michelle Williams’s look. She looks terrified to be there. That is all.
23:40 If Anne Hathaway’s dress is any indication then this Oscars show is going to be ah-mazing. And I love that she is twirling around and having fun. I would be backstage barfing if I had to go out on that stage and carry the show like she is about to.
23:41 Jennifer Hudson is wasting away before our very eyes. I wonder if she can still sing like she used to? She is still trying to make up for the Gold Bolero of Death.
23:44 Amy Adams’s dress is beautiful if someone would run up and take that awful necklace off of her she would look 1000x better. It makes her look like she was playing dress up in a Pretty Pretty Princess game and forgot to take off her winnings.
23:51 Ryan must be on a step of some sort.
23:54 Why has Geoffrey Rush been bald during the entire awards season? Please tell me it is for a role.
23:56 Where is the glam cam? Did the Oscars decide that they were too good for the Glam Cam? How am I supposed to see the shoes?
23:59 I love Cate Blanchett. I think that she can wear anything and if anyone else had that Easter Egg looking contraption-y dress on I would hate it. But alas, I think she is adorable and I am just coveting her hair.
00:01 I have two feelings on Scarlett Johannson please apply accordingly: 1- (to be used if she was the one who was left by Ryan Reynolds) You look great! A brush wouldn’t have killed you but the color is beautiful! 2.(to be used if she was the one who left Ryan Reynolds) What the HELL ScarJo. You are relegated to sackcloth and ashes for the rest of your life. Go home.
00:12 Justin Timberlake. Tom Ford does bowties right. Amen.
00:18 If they ever make a movie from the Mrs Nelson books then Helena Bonham Carter would be perfect. She looks the best that she could have.
00:22 Hillary Swank has my favorite dress. It has shimmer AND feathers. Those are my kryptonite.
00:25 May we all look half as good as Helen Mirren one day. It is so nice to see women looking like women and aging gracefully.
00:27 Christian Bale looks homeless again and I am doubting his ability to turn into Batman again. He is welcome to prove me wrong.
00:29 Penelope Cruz has answered to world’s question as to whether or not she is breastfeeding with no words at all.
00:38 Reece looks like a Barbie and I am totally in love with her hair. She is my best friend in my mind. Do you think she’ll let me borrow her dress?
00:40 Sandra Bullock is pulling a Reece circa 2007 and totally rocking the recently divorced revenge look.
00:42 Halle Berry looks lovely! And irrelevant!
00:55 I am firmly in the camp of Robert Downy Jr doing no wrong. Navy blue suit with white shirt and tie? Sure.
1:02 Natalie Portman is here. She looks really safe and a little out of it. She should have worn what Jane Kaisynski wore to the SAGs.
We are out over here. Will do some spotty live blogging during the awards this year but in a new post. Thanks for coming by.