Everyone has a trait that they would rather no one know about, but sometimes in order to improve, the secret must be told.
I am a quitter.
An honest to goodness quitter. Fight or flight? FLIGHT FLIGHT FLIGHT!!!!! I pick quitting and running over dealing with the hard stuff every time. I am trying to work on that in different areas of my life, some serious and deep- living in London. And some are smaller and less significant- running. It is the small that I intend to talk about today.
I decided that I wanted to start running about a month and a half ago, but I needed motivation and accountability. So I tricked my Dad into promising to run a 5k with me in December under the guise of Christmas tradition and family togetherness. Sucker! We are going to run the White Rock Lake 5k fun run on the weekend after Mike and I get to Texas. I was really excited that he agreed, then I realized that I would actually have to do it. I knew I needed to start running on a very regular basis. I found the program on the internet called Couch to 5kwhich seemed to perfectly describe my situation and I decided to give it a shot. (Full disclosure: I have started this program several times and never made it past week 3 before I quit.) It is a 9 week program that increases your running time a little each week and you train in run/walk intervals. I am already on week five, and the only reason I haven’t put anything about it sooner is because I wanted to give myself plenty of time to quit. See? Quitter.
It was going well and I was enjoying it- shock- but as I ran more and more of the allotted time, I was having severe pain in my ankles. The desire to actually do this came to be in direct conflict with my exercise philosophy: when it hurts, stop. I have never had ankle problems so I wondered what the cause could be. I went to a friend of mine who runs marathons for help. I was hoping she would say that I was just not meant to be a runner and should probably give up. Instead she asked me how old my shoes were. And in a moment when I have never felt more like my father’s daughter, I grudgingly admitted that they were two and a half years old and they were little kids Nikes. I got quite the lecture on needing new running shoes that fit me properly and how running shoes break down and should be replaced frequently. So I hauled my cheap self to John Lewis (department store) and bought me some new Nikes. I was hoping that my ankles would still hurt and I could just sigh in defeat, but darned if I didn’t feel 100% better. Crap- now I am actually going to have to keep doing this!
I said all that not because you care, but because I need to know that someone knows. Virtual accountability if you will. I need to think that someone in Texas will ask me how running is going even if it never happens. I need something to get me out in the cold! So I am back to doing it several times a week though as it gets colder and darker my couch gets comfier and comfier. I just need to think about the real reason that I am doing this: Health? No. Heart? No. Family bonding? No. 5k Tshirt? Definitely.